DATING & MARRIAGE: Our Wedding
THE WEDDING AND HONEYMOON
Well, we did it. We can’t believe we’re old married folks now. Wally and I were married Saturday May 8th in the small gazebo overlooking Laguna Beach, accompanied by a perfect blue sky and a lovely ocean breeze. The reception was a few steps away at the Las Brisas restaurant also overlooking the azure Pacific. Forty family members and friends graciously came from all over the country. They arrived from Memphis, Canada, San Diego, Sylmar, Nebraska, Palos Verdes and Sacramento. We had decided to skip our whole grown up kids’ generation and any ugly bridesmaid’s dresses, and have just the grandkids in the wedding. No pressure to perform, just fun. Wally has two grown, married sons with 3 grandkids, and I have 2 grown daughters and 2 grandkids.
We took our simple vows as the united families formed a circle around us. We wanted all the kids, young and grown up, to see us unafraid to make a commitment for the rest of our lives, amidst a world where commitment and responsibility are often shied away from. My sister’s 2 grown daughters were there with their husbands and almost grown kids. This was the most difficult part for me. You
see, my beloved sister, who had helped raise me, even when we were “latch key kids” had died suddenly of lung cancer the year before. I had complained to God several weeks before the wedding, “She won’t be there! She was supposed to stand up with me!” She was the one that said of Wally, when she met him, “He’s a keeper!” And just as clear as turning on a radio knob, I instantly heard her voice in my head saying, It’s okay, honey, I’ll be there”. Then, after sobbing my heart out, I was okay from then on knowing that she would be there in spirit. And so she was, as I felt her presence. But seeing her grown daughters’ fighting back their tears during the ceremony, I realized they were missing her too.
My 11 year old grandson, Michael, the little man in my family, gave me away, and his sister, 10 year old Megan was our pretty ring bearer. Wally’s 3 little granddaughters ages 4, 3, and 2 came waddling the aisle, as flower girls, all a-frill in their pretty powder blue and white dresses to match my simple, but elegant dress. The little dolls threw most of the rose pedals from their baskets in one spot thinking that would be the most practical way to empty the baskets, to the chuckles of everyone watching. The ceremony went off without a hitch, as we knew it would because, well, there was no such thing as a hitch. Whatever happened, happened and we didn’t give a rip if it was not “perfect”. All we wanted was our family around us and each other for whatever time we have left in this quickly passing world. Wally looked even more handsome than his gorgeous, tanned sons and I still can’t believe this distinguished, jovial, charismatic fox with the contagious grin is now my husband.
After the wedding we all walked several yards to the “Las Brisas” restaurant, overlooking the ocean for a delicious lunch, wedding cake and champagne. You see, we had lured the family to come from all over the country by making the wedding a three day party at the beach. We had rented 10 ocean view rooms, as our gift to them, at our favorite resort hotel a few blocks from the gazebo. And we were very insistent that we would receive no gifts. After all, our own cupboards were packed as tight as sardines in a can to begin with, and who needs another knick-knack to dust?
The partying started Friday afternoon, the day before the wedding. After the families and kids had all arrived, we served a simple, delicious take-out Chinese food on one of the ocean view decks, relaxed and enjoyed the sunset together as each branch of the family got acquainted.
Saturday afternoon after the wedding and reception were over, we all adjourned to our resort hotel where we indulged in boogie boarding, building sand castles and exchanging favorite family stories. At dinner time, we brought in pizza, drinks and a CD I had made of our favorite tunes. I had had weeks of fun putting together, with the help of a DJ, 2 hour’s worth of our favorites to dance to. The music varied from, “Blue Swede Shoes”, “Blueberry Hill”, “The Twist” to “Play That Funky Music, White Boy.” Wally and I love to dance and the “dance floor” rocked out with every age going strong from 3 year olds to those in their 70’s.
Sunday was Mother’s Day. Most of us had brunch at Las Brisas as we dealt with the thought of re-entry shock going back to the real world. To be surrounded by so much love for 3 days left Wally and me in a total state of contentment.
Three days later, Wally and I left for Hawaii. First, we stopped in Honolulu for the specific purpose of seeing Pearl Harbor. I had never been. It was more moving than anything I’ve ever experienced as an American. Standing in the memorial over the USS Arizona, looking at 1177 kids names that went down with the ship made it seem like it happened yesterday. As I leaned over the rail to see the oil still seeping up from below, a young girl next to me was gently throwing flowers into the water. As the oil came up, my tears of gratitude flowed down with her flowers. I was touched to see tears in the eyes of young people and the quiet that settled over all of us as we entered the memorial. One thing I’ve never heard mentioned is how close to shore the USS Arizona was anchored. I imagined boys going to bed that Saturday night thinking if anything happened, they could swim the few yards to shore. But, they never knew what hit them. Sunk in 9 minutes flat. They died before they could even get to the deck and swim to shore. I did the math. 1177 kids, (the youngest was 17 with 36 sets of brothers). If the average age was 22 and most people live to be say, 65 that equals 43 years of life cut off for each. Now, 43 years missed, times 1177 boys equals 50,611 birthdays alone missed, plus 50,611 Christmas holidays. That’s over 100,000 special occasions. Now life is not just lived by special occasions. The years lost to their parents, grandparents, wives, girlfriends, and children is incomprehensible. What cost freedom. Had we not entered WWII because of Pearl Harbor, England could easily have lost the war and we could all be living under terrible tyranny even now. A little study of history tells me that we came very close, several times, to losing that war. We could have all been speaking German now. Had we not been hit at Pearl Harbor, the USA might have delayed entering the war and Great Britain could well have been overcome. I often think occasionally when I get discouraged, of one of my favorite quotes by Winston Churchill, after 40 days of constant bombing in London during that war.
He said, by radio, “We will never, never, never, never give up”.
Later that same day, on the USS Missouri, we stood in the very spot where the surrender of Japan occurred, and saw the bunks the boys slept in. Every American should see Pearl Harbor. I wish I could buy each one a ticket. It really makes you think.
Then, feeling very lucky to be alive, we flew on to our real honeymoon on the beach on the magnificent Island of Maui. Every day we snorkeled somewhere as the thousands of colorful fish put on quite a show! Now, I’m not superstitious at all, but I have to tell you of a glorious experience I had snorkeling. Turquoise is my favorite color. I think the whole world could be different shades of it. Well, twice, while snorkeling, as soon as I put my face in the water, a very large (maybe 10 inches long) gorgeous turquoise fish swam right up to the face of my mask, looked me straight in the eye and swam away never to be seen again. I took that as a sign. Welcome to Hawaii and welcome to my new life with my Wally.
Anyway, we did dinner cruises, excursions to other islands, went to a luau, took a hula lesson and even a lei making lesson. Wally’s kids said we did more in our 2 weeks there than they ever had as adults. But, see, we don’t have forever like they do, so we intend to whoop it up on the excuse that we’re older.
Okay, I have to tell you, I even took a surfing lesson after a lifetime of longingly looking at surfers at home in Huntington Beach. I made no attempt to stand up. Just wanted to see what it felt like to ride a couple of waves in. As if powered by jet fuel, I hung on for dear life as my coach gave me a shove in front of the largest waves I’ve ever seen. I know I was going at least a zillion miles per hour as I looked up long enough to see horror stricken people on shore scattering like sparks from an engine and running for their lives as I came roaring into shore obviously being completely out of control. What a total blast! What a surge of power to feel the strength of nature behind me! Of course, my arm muscles ached for days just from hanging on! But, it is part of our strategy. Do it now. Don’t wait for tomorrow.
We’re home now, snug and almost smug in our new life. We’re each back to work and delirious that we get to come home to the same house every night. Is that really happening after all these years alone or are we just dreaming? Somehow, we’re living in a state of gratitude for life in general. Grateful for our jobs, our health, our kids, for America, for ocean waves to play in, and, well, just every thing. And I hope we will always be thrilled at the memory of how excited everyone was for us on our wedding day. We plan to look for opportunities to express enthusiasm to our loved ones whenever we have that opportunity.
Well, we did it. We can’t believe we’re old married folks now. Wally and I were married Saturday May 8th in the small gazebo overlooking Laguna Beach, accompanied by a perfect blue sky and a lovely ocean breeze. The reception was a few steps away at the Las Brisas restaurant also overlooking the azure Pacific. Forty family members and friends graciously came from all over the country. They arrived from Memphis, Canada, San Diego, Sylmar, Nebraska, Palos Verdes and Sacramento. We had decided to skip our whole grown up kids’ generation and any ugly bridesmaid’s dresses, and have just the grandkids in the wedding. No pressure to perform, just fun. Wally has two grown, married sons with 3 grandkids, and I have 2 grown daughters and 2 grandkids.
We took our simple vows as the united families formed a circle around us. We wanted all the kids, young and grown up, to see us unafraid to make a commitment for the rest of our lives, amidst a world where commitment and responsibility are often shied away from. My sister’s 2 grown daughters were there with their husbands and almost grown kids. This was the most difficult part for me. You
see, my beloved sister, who had helped raise me, even when we were “latch key kids” had died suddenly of lung cancer the year before. I had complained to God several weeks before the wedding, “She won’t be there! She was supposed to stand up with me!” She was the one that said of Wally, when she met him, “He’s a keeper!” And just as clear as turning on a radio knob, I instantly heard her voice in my head saying, It’s okay, honey, I’ll be there”. Then, after sobbing my heart out, I was okay from then on knowing that she would be there in spirit. And so she was, as I felt her presence. But seeing her grown daughters’ fighting back their tears during the ceremony, I realized they were missing her too.
My 11 year old grandson, Michael, the little man in my family, gave me away, and his sister, 10 year old Megan was our pretty ring bearer. Wally’s 3 little granddaughters ages 4, 3, and 2 came waddling the aisle, as flower girls, all a-frill in their pretty powder blue and white dresses to match my simple, but elegant dress. The little dolls threw most of the rose pedals from their baskets in one spot thinking that would be the most practical way to empty the baskets, to the chuckles of everyone watching. The ceremony went off without a hitch, as we knew it would because, well, there was no such thing as a hitch. Whatever happened, happened and we didn’t give a rip if it was not “perfect”. All we wanted was our family around us and each other for whatever time we have left in this quickly passing world. Wally looked even more handsome than his gorgeous, tanned sons and I still can’t believe this distinguished, jovial, charismatic fox with the contagious grin is now my husband.
After the wedding we all walked several yards to the “Las Brisas” restaurant, overlooking the ocean for a delicious lunch, wedding cake and champagne. You see, we had lured the family to come from all over the country by making the wedding a three day party at the beach. We had rented 10 ocean view rooms, as our gift to them, at our favorite resort hotel a few blocks from the gazebo. And we were very insistent that we would receive no gifts. After all, our own cupboards were packed as tight as sardines in a can to begin with, and who needs another knick-knack to dust?
The partying started Friday afternoon, the day before the wedding. After the families and kids had all arrived, we served a simple, delicious take-out Chinese food on one of the ocean view decks, relaxed and enjoyed the sunset together as each branch of the family got acquainted.
Saturday afternoon after the wedding and reception were over, we all adjourned to our resort hotel where we indulged in boogie boarding, building sand castles and exchanging favorite family stories. At dinner time, we brought in pizza, drinks and a CD I had made of our favorite tunes. I had had weeks of fun putting together, with the help of a DJ, 2 hour’s worth of our favorites to dance to. The music varied from, “Blue Swede Shoes”, “Blueberry Hill”, “The Twist” to “Play That Funky Music, White Boy.” Wally and I love to dance and the “dance floor” rocked out with every age going strong from 3 year olds to those in their 70’s.
Sunday was Mother’s Day. Most of us had brunch at Las Brisas as we dealt with the thought of re-entry shock going back to the real world. To be surrounded by so much love for 3 days left Wally and me in a total state of contentment.
Three days later, Wally and I left for Hawaii. First, we stopped in Honolulu for the specific purpose of seeing Pearl Harbor. I had never been. It was more moving than anything I’ve ever experienced as an American. Standing in the memorial over the USS Arizona, looking at 1177 kids names that went down with the ship made it seem like it happened yesterday. As I leaned over the rail to see the oil still seeping up from below, a young girl next to me was gently throwing flowers into the water. As the oil came up, my tears of gratitude flowed down with her flowers. I was touched to see tears in the eyes of young people and the quiet that settled over all of us as we entered the memorial. One thing I’ve never heard mentioned is how close to shore the USS Arizona was anchored. I imagined boys going to bed that Saturday night thinking if anything happened, they could swim the few yards to shore. But, they never knew what hit them. Sunk in 9 minutes flat. They died before they could even get to the deck and swim to shore. I did the math. 1177 kids, (the youngest was 17 with 36 sets of brothers). If the average age was 22 and most people live to be say, 65 that equals 43 years of life cut off for each. Now, 43 years missed, times 1177 boys equals 50,611 birthdays alone missed, plus 50,611 Christmas holidays. That’s over 100,000 special occasions. Now life is not just lived by special occasions. The years lost to their parents, grandparents, wives, girlfriends, and children is incomprehensible. What cost freedom. Had we not entered WWII because of Pearl Harbor, England could easily have lost the war and we could all be living under terrible tyranny even now. A little study of history tells me that we came very close, several times, to losing that war. We could have all been speaking German now. Had we not been hit at Pearl Harbor, the USA might have delayed entering the war and Great Britain could well have been overcome. I often think occasionally when I get discouraged, of one of my favorite quotes by Winston Churchill, after 40 days of constant bombing in London during that war.
He said, by radio, “We will never, never, never, never give up”.
Later that same day, on the USS Missouri, we stood in the very spot where the surrender of Japan occurred, and saw the bunks the boys slept in. Every American should see Pearl Harbor. I wish I could buy each one a ticket. It really makes you think.
Then, feeling very lucky to be alive, we flew on to our real honeymoon on the beach on the magnificent Island of Maui. Every day we snorkeled somewhere as the thousands of colorful fish put on quite a show! Now, I’m not superstitious at all, but I have to tell you of a glorious experience I had snorkeling. Turquoise is my favorite color. I think the whole world could be different shades of it. Well, twice, while snorkeling, as soon as I put my face in the water, a very large (maybe 10 inches long) gorgeous turquoise fish swam right up to the face of my mask, looked me straight in the eye and swam away never to be seen again. I took that as a sign. Welcome to Hawaii and welcome to my new life with my Wally.
Anyway, we did dinner cruises, excursions to other islands, went to a luau, took a hula lesson and even a lei making lesson. Wally’s kids said we did more in our 2 weeks there than they ever had as adults. But, see, we don’t have forever like they do, so we intend to whoop it up on the excuse that we’re older.
Okay, I have to tell you, I even took a surfing lesson after a lifetime of longingly looking at surfers at home in Huntington Beach. I made no attempt to stand up. Just wanted to see what it felt like to ride a couple of waves in. As if powered by jet fuel, I hung on for dear life as my coach gave me a shove in front of the largest waves I’ve ever seen. I know I was going at least a zillion miles per hour as I looked up long enough to see horror stricken people on shore scattering like sparks from an engine and running for their lives as I came roaring into shore obviously being completely out of control. What a total blast! What a surge of power to feel the strength of nature behind me! Of course, my arm muscles ached for days just from hanging on! But, it is part of our strategy. Do it now. Don’t wait for tomorrow.
We’re home now, snug and almost smug in our new life. We’re each back to work and delirious that we get to come home to the same house every night. Is that really happening after all these years alone or are we just dreaming? Somehow, we’re living in a state of gratitude for life in general. Grateful for our jobs, our health, our kids, for America, for ocean waves to play in, and, well, just every thing. And I hope we will always be thrilled at the memory of how excited everyone was for us on our wedding day. We plan to look for opportunities to express enthusiasm to our loved ones whenever we have that opportunity.
posted by Ann Baker, Realtor at
7:17 PM
